I Wanna Be Loved
by xNik Nakx
Summary: Harry's reflecting on his journey ahead, into the unknown, where he will eventually face the dark lord, his enemy, and he knows that he has to come out on top in order to keep his friends safe.


A small room lay messy, musty, unlived in, a stark contrast to the rest of the house

A small room lay messy, musty, unlived in, a stark contrast to the rest of the house. A boy, skinny, pale and his head covered with unruly black hair. He looked the complete opposite of the other male occupants of the house, whom were blond, overweight and healthy looking. He was the neglected nephew of the adult owners of the house, who he had lived with since his parents' death shortly after his first birthday. He was malnourished, ignored and considered to be a waste of space.

_I had a roof overhead  
Had shoes on my feet  
Sure I was fed, but no-one was there  
When I was in need, yeah  
_

Harry James Potter had another home, his boarding school for Witches and Wizards, where he was accepted for what he was. The Wizarding world was one in which he was not isolated, excluded or ignored. Sure, he was stared at for being a hero, which he rather disliked, but at least in the world of wizards and witches he could live, really live. Before his returned to the world he should have grown up in, he felt a great sense of belonging, without really knowing his own identity, his own past, and the things that were fairytales to other magical children when they were smaller.

_  
So who am I now?  
Who do you want me to be?  
I can forgive you, but I won't relive you  
I ain't the same scared kid I used to be  
_

His anger at his aunt, uncle and cousin bubbled under the surface of himself, usually blocked by distractions. His schooling, the threat of Voldemort, his friends and extra-curricular activities usually kept him distracted, forgetting of his harboured hatred for his muggle relatives. He was determined, especially after his discovery of the prophecy, to live on and continue, getting to live the full life he always dreamed of.

_  
I'm gonna live  
I'm gonna survive  
Don't want the world to pass me by  
I'm gonna dream  
I ain't gonna die  
Thinking my life was just a lie  
I wanna be loved  
I wanna be loved  
_

He still had that old photo album, the one given to him by Hagrid at the end of his first year at Hogwarts. The pictures of his beaming parents, the closest thing he had to his memories of his beloved parents. Lily and James. The rest of the community, at least he ones who really knew his parents, all spoke so highly of them, as if they were really likable and admired people. And they were his parents. He wished upon a thousand stars that his parents were proud of him, wherever they were. He hoped that they weren't disappointed in him for some of the choices that he had made that he himself was ashamed of.

_  
I found a picture  
Our so-called family tree, yeah  
I broke all the branches, looking for answers  
Don't you know that ain't how it's supposed to be  
_

His parents, even though he couldn't remember them, gave him an unknown strength. He wanted to do them proud. They gave him a boost in his inner-strength, almost as if they were adding their power to his. He felt their love, their hopes for him, in his heart, the same feeling he received in every hug from Mrs. Weasley, from Hermione, from Ginny. It enlightened him, it empowered him, it made him feel as if he could conquer the world. Invincible. He could take on the world and beat Him. He could feel it. _  
_

_I'm gonna live  
I'm gonna survive  
Don't want the world to pass me by  
I'm gonna dream  
I ain't gonna die  
Thinking my life was just a lie  
I wanna give  
I'm ready to try  
Willing to lay it on the line  
I wanna be loved  
I wanna be  
_

The time was coming closer, the time in which would be time for the ultimate confrontation between Harry and his enemy, the Dark Lord. He was afraid, afraid that he would suffer, he would lose, that all his friends and adopted family would be in danger if he was defeated and Voldemort took over the magical world. Pure-bloods who knew their place in magical society would be like the royalty they always thought that they were. Blood Traitors and muggle borns would be slaughtered, seen as nothing but the scum that deserved to be vaporised by a pure-blood's wand. The world would become a horrible place, and he wasn't going to let it happen.

_  
I ain't gonna cry  
I don't wanna scream  
But I got so much left unsaid inside of me  
_

He wouldn't let his friends suffer at the hands of Voldemort because of his own failures. He had no choice but to win, to kill the Dark Lord and free the magical world from the Dark Lord's grip. He would be viewed as more of a saviour as he already was, but he would put up with it because he knew he was doing the right thing. He knew what had to be done. It was time.

_  
I'm gonna live  
I'm gonna survive  
Don't want the world to pass me by  
I'm gonna dream  
I ain't gonna die  
Thinking my life was just a lie  
I wanna give  
I'm ready to try  
Willing to lay it on the line  
I wanna be loved  
I wanna be  
I just wanna be loved  
I wanna be loved_

Harry Potter, Boy-Who-Lived, Conqueror of You-Know-Who and youngest seeker in a century for a Hogwarts House team. He had most of the wizarding populous behind him, and he was going to use that to his advantage, without sacrificing anyone, even though he knew in his heart of hearts that people he loved and cared for were going to die, no matter what he did to stop them. It was the unavoidable.


End file.
